So crazy to think that I've already been on maternity leave for over 3 months now! It's all been a blur and I've said this many times, but it always seems so fast when I think back on it, yet, also so slow when I'm just dealing with each day. My life has obviously changed drastically - from the regular 9-5 to being a full stay at home mom. Honestly, I haven't even had any free time to even think about it or "miss my past life." You don't have time to be able to ponder about life when you have an infant to take care of.
EXCEPT! When you have your mom to help, you have the luxury of these little windows of time to think and write blog posts ;)
Every day is still a challenge. With baby's growth and ever-changing developments, the needs just change, but each day is still equally hard in its own way. I don't think there'll ever be a day where it'll feel 'easy' enough for me to feel comfortable where I'll feel 'ready' to go back to work and juggle motherhood and career. My husband says that his coworkers says it gets significantly easier when they're six. SIX YEARS IS A LONG ASS TIME. I think that's nearly the same time me and Carlo have been together.
I was listening to a podcast where they mentioned that motherhood specifically for this generation is very different than the past. Females in our generation were brought up to be independent and go-getters, in the sense of career. Women in our generation feel a loss of self when they are all of a sudden tied down to the needs of an infant and not have their own lives and independence like they used to, in terms of both career and going out.
For me, I don't necessarily feel that loss of independence. I felt it a bit in the first few weeks, but not now. I categorize myself as the nurturing type, and I would ideally WANT to be a full-time stay at home mom, but it is really exhausting. I find myself pretty gassed out when only half the day has passed. Entertaining and tending to a baby is extremely tiring. I feel bad when I just leave her on the playmat kicking on her own for 30 minutes to an hour at a time, wondering to myself if she's getting the full potential of her day, if that makes sense. Like, could she be learning more if I was talking or interacting with her?
Given the option of daycare or a sitter, I'd definitely take it. And I don't feel bad for saying that. It takes a freakin' VILLAGE to raise a child. The landscape would look much different if we were at home with both of our families were here to take turns to help but it's hard when it's just two of us. That was another thing that came up on the podcast, Back in the day, families would all live in close proximity to each other and be able to help, but it's been on the rise where families move away from each other.
But yeah. What am I trying to say here?
Being a full-time stay at home mom is hard work. It's MORE than full-time because it's a 24 hour job, not an 8 hour shift. Kudos to all the stay-at-home moms out there. I don't think it's for me. At least not right now when she's an infant. Maybe when she's older and I can actually interact with her and she goes to school in the daytime, or if we had more hands/family to help.
Shout out to all the stay at home moms! I definitely have a newfound respect for them.
EXCEPT! When you have your mom to help, you have the luxury of these little windows of time to think and write blog posts ;)
Every day is still a challenge. With baby's growth and ever-changing developments, the needs just change, but each day is still equally hard in its own way. I don't think there'll ever be a day where it'll feel 'easy' enough for me to feel comfortable where I'll feel 'ready' to go back to work and juggle motherhood and career. My husband says that his coworkers says it gets significantly easier when they're six. SIX YEARS IS A LONG ASS TIME. I think that's nearly the same time me and Carlo have been together.
I was listening to a podcast where they mentioned that motherhood specifically for this generation is very different than the past. Females in our generation were brought up to be independent and go-getters, in the sense of career. Women in our generation feel a loss of self when they are all of a sudden tied down to the needs of an infant and not have their own lives and independence like they used to, in terms of both career and going out.
For me, I don't necessarily feel that loss of independence. I felt it a bit in the first few weeks, but not now. I categorize myself as the nurturing type, and I would ideally WANT to be a full-time stay at home mom, but it is really exhausting. I find myself pretty gassed out when only half the day has passed. Entertaining and tending to a baby is extremely tiring. I feel bad when I just leave her on the playmat kicking on her own for 30 minutes to an hour at a time, wondering to myself if she's getting the full potential of her day, if that makes sense. Like, could she be learning more if I was talking or interacting with her?
Given the option of daycare or a sitter, I'd definitely take it. And I don't feel bad for saying that. It takes a freakin' VILLAGE to raise a child. The landscape would look much different if we were at home with both of our families were here to take turns to help but it's hard when it's just two of us. That was another thing that came up on the podcast, Back in the day, families would all live in close proximity to each other and be able to help, but it's been on the rise where families move away from each other.
But yeah. What am I trying to say here?
Being a full-time stay at home mom is hard work. It's MORE than full-time because it's a 24 hour job, not an 8 hour shift. Kudos to all the stay-at-home moms out there. I don't think it's for me. At least not right now when she's an infant. Maybe when she's older and I can actually interact with her and she goes to school in the daytime, or if we had more hands/family to help.
Shout out to all the stay at home moms! I definitely have a newfound respect for them.
Comments
Post a Comment