emolychan

So crazy to think that I've already been on maternity leave for over 3 months now! It's all been a blur and I've said this many times, but it always seems so fast when I think back on it, yet, also so slow when I'm just dealing with each day. My life has obviously changed drastically - from the regular 9-5 to being a full stay at home mom. Honestly, I haven't even had any free time to even think about it or "miss my past life." You don't have time to be able to ponder about life when you have an infant to take care of. EXCEPT! When you have your mom to help, you have the luxury of these little windows of time to think and write blog posts ;) Every day is still a challenge. With baby's growth and ever-changing developments, the needs just change, but each day is still equally hard in its own way. I don't think there'll ever be a day where it'll feel 'easy' enough for me to feel comfortable where I'll feel 'ready' ...

Wow! I remember reading that after the 3 month mark is the beginning of the enchanted months, and so far, it seems to be true. I thought the first few nights of her sleeping through the night or only having one night feeding was a fluke, but it's been pretty consistent in this past week. SO NICE. I still do wake up 1-2 times even if she's not up simply because I get really hot on my chest / my boobs getting full from milk. So I still have to relieve some of the milk and it's nice just get up to cool off. But it's nice because it's me voluntarily getting up instead of being forced up, and I'm only up for 10-15 mins vs 30-90 minutes - easier to go back to sleep. It's crazy that her sleeping throughout the night started IMMEDIATELY once she turned 3 months old. Crazy. In addition to that, it's nice that when she does wake up from sleeping, that she doesn't need food (aka me) immediately. Sometimes she's just up because she's up and I can jus...

Mya's 3 month update / accomplishments! Constipated for exactly a week after her 2 month immunizations, bought probiotics due to a tip from a Youtube mom, and she had a big poop the morning after. THANKFULLY. She was super gassy the whole week and extremely cranky (cried alot) Started putting hands to face at 10 weeks Coos when trying to talk (I call them chicken noises) Hands and arms move around with more purpose.. still not grabbing things though. Fists starting to be more unclenched Started making bubbles at the mouth Graduated! from her 1-3 month clothes almost exactly at the 3 month mark!! Grabs my arms with her feet while changing (lol, what a little monkey) Sits upright for a short period of time LOVES kicking on her playmat!!!! ALWAYS somehow kicks her socks off - lol Stopped hating tummy-time as much.. actually holds her head up for a bit at 45 degrees for a little before she cries STARTING to not HATE bathtime as much.. in the beginning, she would cry like M...

            I feel sad/angry/confused when I see article titles like this. People being praised for being themselves and for being real.. what does it mean when 'reality' has been a facade this whole time. It's crazy how society holds people (especially women) to a certain standard. You have to look THIS way. Why are you sad? You should just be happy. You should have a partner and be married at a this age. And have children. And also own a house and be thinking about having another kid already. But don't always stay at home and make sure you work out and hang out with friends at least a few times a week. Also, make sure you get enough sleep even though all the demands that society puts on you doesn't physically allow it. Just let us LIVE. Everyone already has enough shit to deal with on a daily basis. And to be happy? That's a whole 'nother level.

More often than not, people seem surprised and shocked that I didn't use an epidural for my delivery.  "You're so brave for not using the epidural!!" I've heard a bunch of comments like that. Umm, thanks..? IDK. Is it really that courageous of me? Is it the norm to want to use one? Do I regret not using it? HELL NO! Then again, my contractions only lasted about two hours (and was only really bad for that last 40-60 minutes when they really intensified.) Then again, by the time I felt like I needed it, I was already in the last stage of delivery. Once the nurses told me I was close, I knew I had it in the bag. The main factors of me deciding not to use it: Epidurals haven't even existed for the last 50 years or so and women have literally been doing it without any drugs for thousands of years. I don't like taking medicine/drugs (foreign substances) if I don't have to. I don't even take medicines for colds or flus. I'm the type of person wh...

Wow! I feel like it's been an eternity since my last update, but it was just 4 days ago about my past weekend. She's turning 3 months soon! As for me, her turning 3 months meant another growth spurt at this time.. which means.. clusterfeeding!! Her last growth spurt was about a month ago (seems like an eternity), but yeah.. it meant I only got 3 hours of sleep in a 12 hour timespan. Thankfully it's always temporary and she always tends to have good sleep the day after or so, but when you're going through it, it's terrible. You have no idea what it's like to wake up in the middle of the night, look at the clock, and only see that you only had one hour of sleep @_@.. knowing that the cycle might continue 2 to 3 times before the sun even rises. IT'S THE WORST. I forgot there was another instance of clusterfeeding last week that happened during the daytime.. it was pretty terrible and it happened to be a day that my mom decided to go out to Central Park so I h...

Holy shit, y'all, it's already May. How the hell do people get back to work after 6 weeks? Physically it's still been exhausting, though I guess if I DID have to put Mya in daycare, I would have more energy, but the night feedings would still be a biatch. America really needs to rethink maternity leave. I think realistically, a woman needs at least 3-4 months to get back on track and to fully bond with the baby. I have been thinking about post-maternity leave plans and if I'm going back to work "part-time" and whatnot.. "part-time work" has been an odd concept. If you work part-time, are you then also a part-time mom? Isn't there only a limited number of hours in a day? Being a mom is a full-time job NO MATTER WHAT. But yeah. I still don't really know what I'm gonna do yet and the time is creeping up to where I really need to hone down a plan and talk to my boss. Going back to how a woman needs at least 3-4 months to get back on t...